Have you ever said “never” or “never again” and had it come back to haunt you? Maybe more than a few times? It’s often said with the best of intentions, however, the “never” will without a doubt present itself again when old habits die hard. In the organizing and housekeeping industry we strive to set our clients up for long-term success while we work with them in their homes. After they’ve completed the agonizing decision-making process, combined with the physical labor, and have paid the price that comes along with the accumulation of things and not maintaining order, we often hear, “I’ll never let that happen again!”
Six years ago, we began work with a family with pretty unique circumstances (of course they all are). Some of the less confidential obstacles included: A large home, three young children, a failing marriage, one parent at home, and the other more committed to work and travel than home and family. Regardless of circumstances, a form of depression often accompanies these situations that can be debilitating when one feels they are facing their situation alone. At that time, we were engaged as hands on coaches identifying problem areas and implementing new systems to conquer clutter and restore order. Once we possessed a clear understanding of how this family unit functioned, we also assembled a master family plan to maintain order and instill successful habits for everyone, including the kiddos.
Fast-forward six years and a divorce later. The large house is in different hands, the three children are six years older and not held accountable for much of anything around the new house. Because one parent wouldn’t respect the other, the children have followed suit, and the new house is a disaster. I can’t stress strongly enough the importance of spousal respect and support viewed through the eyes of our children and the lasting effect it has on them. This doesn’t mean that parents agree on absolutely everything, however, we must simply put our minds together for the benefit of our children. Unfortunately, the easier thing to do in unhealthy marriages is to elevate one’s own status over the other parent not realizing the children are the ones being hurt and set up for unhealthy relationships themselves.
The good news is that we’ve been invited back to restore order and, more importantly, to assist with ongoing and routine accountability through our housekeeping services. The key word here is “routine.” The Shine team will NOT be showing up to enable the existing behavior but rather shine the surfaces after things have been put back in the places they belong.
Take advantage of the upcoming summer season and begin delegating more responsibilities to your children. Use caution with your teaching style and avoid over critiquing. Summer is an excellent time to kick old habits to the curb and set your family up for success.
Do your kids a favor … hold them accountable. It’s hard work but they’re worth it!